Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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