He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
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