mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
