Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize