My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Randomize
