We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize