I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Randomize
