girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
