im gay
i know
yea but for you.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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