Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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