3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
