OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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