im drinking this country out of the recession.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Less talking, more tequila
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
