he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Randomize
