you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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