guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
