remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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