I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
