My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
