dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
