i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
