just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
