Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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