I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Randomize
