this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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