Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
