Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
