yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
