Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
