Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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