is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize