make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
