it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
