READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
