with your own penis?
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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