im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
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