whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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