We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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