I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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