I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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