Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
We are all done wearing pants today
My vagina just clenched in fear
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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