i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
After last night, I could never be a politician.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
We are all done wearing pants today
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
