I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
