sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Randomize
