she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
