I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize