All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
