remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
