So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
