i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
