just tell him i said nine months
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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